Check... and uncheck

I got rear ended and finally went to the body shop to get a quote to offer the offender a price to do it outside of insurance. I had to pull some bad Vietnamese and reminded him of my father who referred me to get a good price.

It was lunch so I grabbed a Subway's "daily special" for 3 bucks! And called the offender about the price. He was glad to do it outside of insurance and I gave him address. I was feeling accomplished and was in a good mood because my lunch was cheap and I got something done. When I walked back to my car, I realized that I locked myself out. Apparently, I was too occupied with DJ Barney Frando's CDs that I put my keys in the cup holder instead of my pocket. Damn it.

Ok. At the CTC Banquet, the guy from AAA showed me how to break into my car with my antenna. I decided to give it a try. The antenna was too long and I sort of scratched the car next to me. I waited for it to move and tried for 10 minutes to no avail. What makes it worse was the car was taunting me. As I wiggled the pole, I saw the lock go up very slightly. But I didn't want to force it and break my antenna and it went back down. Cursed. I think people from IBM, Intel... etc were watching me.

I gave up because I didn't want police to come by... "it's my car I swear!!" God how embarrassing. I decided to walk back to work about 3 city blocks and told no one. How irresponsible could I be?! Just fire me now for being a fool. I hope I don't get towed.

Here I am at my cubicle. Tomorrow our reps from Korea are coming and I have to give a presentation about the products that I know nothing about even after 4 months. The VP was obviously disappointed when I was practicing in front of her. I can't concentrate.

Check and Uncheck. I'm ridiculous.

I Have a Date... I think

Or maybe just a lunch...

I guess, I'm taking what Seyron said to heart about dating. People take it too seriously. You date for fun and to get to know someone. You're not obligated to do anything afterward. In fact, he might even be straight, but that doesn't matter, I just want to do something special... you know? It's something playful that people do. And...people need to realize that dating doesn't mean hooking up or committing. It's just another form of social interaction that's necessary to our sanity.

I'm not usually like this, I assure you.

===================================================================

Diana said that I should change my "hairchives" to "Ode to Myself."

Well... here's a picture of me in an AX jacket that I was considering buying because Jen said it looked really nice on me. And you guys know I can't dress myself for shit. But it would be the most expensive piece of clothing I've ever purchased.

What do you think? Should I go back and get it?

I also tried on some jeans, but they were "crotch-high." No pictures.
Jen had a good laugh at me; pointing at my bulge.

Also, DJ Barney Frando sent me 7 CDs of his mixes as he promised! OMG!

Not So Turkey Thanksgiving Happenings

Thursday Night: Failed Shopping
I wanted to experience the madness on Black African American Friday

Monyrith, Huan, my cousin and I headed to the Great Mall that opened at midnight. We didn't even enter the parking lot and already we were accosted by rude people in their vehicles. People are crazy. Instead we went to Quickly's to get a snack. :D ThE and his boy met up with us a little later.

Friday: Ignia Lunch at Pizza Chicago
Diana pointed out that somebody missed being a part of student orgs. That somebody was me because I was planning the Christmas party as if it were some student sponsored event. LOL. Check out Sandy and My love child.

Friday Night: Benefit Concert
My family is impressive. Even though I doubted the event, they managed to fill Milano Night club with 500 Vietnamese people dancing to my family's rendition of CHACHA songs, Disco songs and of course Vietnamese songs. The event was for my Aunt who is in the last stage of cancer. She was a popular singer from Hawaii and in club Lido in San Jose. A famous Vietanmese Radio show guy tried to get in for free. My mom wouldn't let him in because he was so rude and cheap. So he's probably going to shit talk about the band. LOL. Geez. There's my dad rocking out! Maybe YOUR Vietnamese parents were there!

At 11, the cousins headed to VOODOO where they were playing underground hip hop. When we entered, there were ppl battling! OMG! It was tight. Mony and my cousin bar hopped and came back to find my other cousin hunched over. Security asked us to escort her out and she proclaimed that she loved me and that she just wanted me to be happy. After she threw up on my shoes, her boyfriend took her home and she woke up in the car at 6:30AM next to him because he couldn't get her out. Aww.

I think it's hot when straight guys are buddybuddy with each other. After, my cousin's boyfriend helped her in the car, his best friend kissed him on the cheek good-bye. My heart melted. Absolutely adorable. I called my cousin the next day to confirm his sexuality. "Oh they're just really good friends.. they're really comfortable with each other." That sort of affection makes me smile from ear to ear.

I came back to my family's event wasted. I showed pictures of my cousin drunk to her mom and I said... "Your Daughter's a MESS!" To this she responded, "OH MY GOD." I got a good laugh out of embarrassing my cousin. EVIL. I devoured what my mom was eating and spoke bad, gay broken Vietnamese to strangers while cleaning up the place.

Saturday Night: Ignia at Vivid
-Caitlin's dad was our chauffeur

-The DJ was bad

-Cindy gave us VIP passes!

-More pictures here: Part I & Part II

Yes! Another San Jose Bar/Night Club off our list.

Sunday: Church & Shopping

This weekend glass was broken numerous times. I'm scared what that could mean. I broke a wine glass, center pieces shattered because my car was rear ended. A Snapple bottle broke in my kitchen and something else in the hallway. I went to church because my Grandma's name was going to be called to be "prayed for." Once again I questioned the whole process. I remembered Sally going to church for the first time... "it was interesting......it was like a cult." I realized this as I was holding hands with strangers reciting words that I didn't really understand. And these people, were they really going to pray for my grandma that passed away last year? And how does that even mean anything?! Do more prayers mean a better chance youre spirit will be set free? I think it's more for the family/friends to know that they have that support.

Perturbed, I decided not to accept the body of Christ this Sunday because the "readings" were the same, the discussion about "family" didn't go anywhere and the "words of Christ" escaped me after watching The Mist, but then I realized something. When I drive... I touch the cross that hangs from my rear view mirror. And though I am a horrible driver, I have managed to stay clear from accidents. *knock on wood* I would be a damn hypocrit to turn my back away from the faith that I depend on when I'm scared. So I accepted the bread and this time..... it meant something.

Outside of the church, I noticed a cute boy waiting inside his car with the door open. He caught my eye and did the head nod to acknowledge me. I gave him a half smile and looked down. Was that a sin?

I bought a shirt from Valley Fair that Monyrith "absolutely hates on me." And since EVERYONE says he has style... I need to return it. Bah.

I ran into Justin at In&Out. He was my first crush and he was still cute. In middle school, I was really touchy and he flirted with me back. When he found out I liked him for real, he freaked out. Oops. I was able to hold a conversation with him and wanted to hug him. But instead, I carassed his arm in a very buddy buddy way and headed out the door. Hehe, aww. I wonder if he's messed around with a guy before...

We Need to Be Surrounded by People We Think Love Us.

My cousins know I'm gay.

"Is he your friend? or your FRRRIIIEND?"
Apparently, my cousins were impressed by Monyrith. Charming and well dressed. And of course suspicion lined the air because Mony was at my Thanksgiving and family lunch.

I felt a sense of relief has been lifted after all these year. I can talk about things that are really on my mind to my cousins finally.

Thanksgiving was wonderful. I felt more in tune with my cousins and the games we played after dinner were hilarious. A had to be there story: My cousin says, "can we at least say grace?" My other cousin responds, "YES! Can I get a Hallelujah?!" Everyone shouts "Hallelujah!" "Can I get an AMEN?!" I raise my hand as if I was at a gospel church. "AMEN!" The response was louder and after a couple of chuckles people dug in. It simulated a sitcom. You had to be there.

The turkey was two hours late, but I enjoyed a conversation with the guys. We talked about work and I felt like grown up talking about grown up things to people were about to get married or already are. I was transitioning out of the 'kid's table.' Granted I'll always return because that's where it's at. A number of hilarious things were said that night and it felt warm.



My other cousin vehemently told me that she felt that people are narcissistic. We DONT need to have children of our own blood to feel complete. We are narcissistic because people want "little clones" running around and that the "natural" "biological" need to reproduce and have a "conventional family" is complete bullshit. Adopting should be just fine and gay people should be able to enjoy their lives without such pressures placed upon them by society. I was amazed that she would have such a stand point. And in a way I felt as though she was letting me in on her thoughts as I obviously became more comfortable with mine.

But she IS right. We are narcissistic creatures and need to feel as though we are loved and that what we are doing in life is worth recognition.

===================================================================

Before the Thanksgiving dinner at my house was my Grandma's memorial service. The house was full of 20 strangers reciting hymns for my grandma. And then they had a great Vietnamese lunch and left. My mom asked me what I thought. And I responded that it was nice. At that point I wondered if I should tell her how I really felt. There is a point where I should have respected what she was doing and kept my big mouth shut.

"If you want to know the truth Mom. I thought it was okay. These strangers in our house mean nothing to me and that my prayer and yours should be good enough! They don't know grandma, they mean NOTHING." She explained what she thought.

"That what you may feel, but you don't completely understand. I can't do this by myself Christopher, I am an only child. And it would be great if our family on dad's side was enough, but it's not. They don't know how to pray. Sometimes, we just need people to support us when we need them because sometimes the people that 'matter' are unavailable or incapable of providing what you need. They may be strangers, but their prayers DO mean something. It means a lot to me... that I have some sort of support. And I feel good that the room is full of people that support me... "

I remembered that morning how upset I was at my mom. I told her that I would be home late and I wouldn't be able to help much. I crashed at Mony's and came home at 8am to help prepare for the memorial. My dad told me she was upset. I was angry because if she needed me she should have called. I asked her who the food was for and she responded that it was for the service... and she started to cry. I thought she was being dramatic and I was pissed that she was angry that I wasn't home because I managed to complete the tasks in the morning. I dismissed her tears. But now.. I know why. She just needed me there to be with her. She needed support.... and apparently these strangers provided that comfort that I failed to provide. I am selfish... and my mom was alone.

Fuck me.
===================================================================

November Recap

Nov.3: ThE Cooks & Karaoke!

ThE cooked some awesome Pad See Ew! After my lychi slush slash parrot bay drinks we headed to Korea town for some Karaoke. Can't forget Destiny's Child! But once again they forgot to Record a CD of us. I hate them.

Nov.9: FUZ
Check out this girl. She's a HOT dancer, everyone else in the performance looked like BUTT.

Kids were hyphy but the DJ was OFF THE HOOK! And I <3>

Nov.14: Mony Birthday & Convention Center Exploring

While waiting for Mony to get off of work so I can give him his present. Neil and I explored. WOW! Key club memories at the San Jose Convention Center. I was just as big as I remembered! During caucuss, I was asked to relate Key Club to my Hair. "Like Key Club, my hair goes... ABOVE AND BEYOND!"

Nov.15: VSA Showcase

I miss everyone!

Nov.16: Mony Surprise Birthday!
It was quite difficult to gather his high school friends. But Mony is predictable!

I hope he loved it. <3

Nov.16: Dragon Outing

We decided that going to Dragon once a month is enough. And since we only had two girls, we decided that Dragon would be more fun than Downtown San Jose which requires more more than one set of boobs.

-I was really confident and flirtatous. :D I love it.

-There's Eric talking to PKDJ about the how much the last song he played sucked.

-There's Mony. He bit his tongue at Denny's.

-There's Jon. I hope he knew his name... at least.

-There's me on the bottom center. Don't I look like Tofu from some other picture?

Nov.Something: Thuy at the MALL!! <3

I introduced her to tarty Yogurt, now she's HOOKED!

Food: NON STOP!

Udon at Mony's favorite Japanese food place, Pasta Pomadora where Jen showed us her nice angles and Thai Basil... Aren't my friends cute?


Misc

Mony show me this awesome view of San Jose and this playground with awesome spinning things. Mony threw up after, he was so dizzy! And there's the fan from my laptop. Yes, it's still broken. I am not a certified hardware specialist. Damn it.