My friend told me that while he was having dinner with his family his auntie who is very outspoken said, "So... when are you getting married!?"
He responded with nervous laughter. His mom shifted in her seat, his brother looked away.
It seems that things have become a bit confusing now that gay marriage is legal in California. Simply put - gays can now be held to the same marriage pressures as straights and this is causing anxiety.
My coworker told me that her gay friends are getting married as well as breaking up. "You mean... it's legal now? Like... we're held together by legal documents and lawyers and shared property? Fuckkk."
A good chunk of the gay community has accepted the fact that they couldn't get married and have created a life style based around that concept - open relationships, endless shirtless parties. Without "the right to marriage" gays have instead found themselves taking pride in "the right to party and feel sexy forever..." We are the lost boys of Neverland in costumes smoking with Native Americans and swimming with mermaids without sleep or responsibility while the rest of London slaves away with their social norms.
But now our parents and family members can ask us questions that we never thought we would hear. "You're getting old now... when do you think you will settle down."
For the past 3 years I have been observing my straight friends getting married through facebook. "Good luck with that." Get those eggs while they are still fresh. I also watched some get divorced... I guess they weren't "the one" after all. Someone owes me $20. I observed single straight people freaking out about their biological clock and rushing to match.com and other dating sites to help find that person that they were meant to be with... forever. While gays continue to rush to Grindr... to find "the one" as well... the one for this evening that is.
When gay marriage was legalized, my friends celebrated by going to WeHo... to drink. How else do you celebrate... important things like equality? I recently saw an ad in a gay magazine, "Find your husband at the Hollywood Spa." Yes, new ways to advertise gay activities.
So I didn't think anything really changed. The idea of getting married was still foreign... and my previous post about marriage was still a joke...
Then I saw this in my facebook feed:
Marriage proposal at SF Gay Pride. 6 years together.
Destination Iceland Wedding.
SHIT GOT REAL. SHIT GOT REALLY REAL.
I guess equality means getting the same rights as well as the same pressures as everyone else. I just never thought this day would come.