Sunday, March 17, 2013
This is a candid picture that Darnell shot of us at a house warming party. I smother Jimmy with a lot of love and affection... I think because he smells so good that I like to rub my face into his.
I'm really proud of him - a new job, a new sense of confidence, ambition and inspiration to improve his wardrobe and work on photo projects. All of which make him a better person. His new attitude draws me closer to him and I am utterly thrilled. He's buying me dinners and found me a great Ben Sherman shirt from the Thrift Shop that I love. And by doing so he's showing me how much he's appreciated my support through the two years we've been together.
Straight people have asked me, is he "the one." ... are we going to spend the REST of our lives together? I don't know, he doesn't know. It doesn't matter.
I've realized lately that I have no timeline. No sense of urgency to buy a house, get married, have a family at certain deadlines. And I feel like this is common among gay people - not necessarily career wise because face it.. who really run the world? Gays... well white gays, but gays nonetheless. But in regards to relationships and settling down, partying like you're in your 20s carry into your 30s into your 40s into your 50s... because you can't get married anyway, because gay life is fun and there's no rush. And if you're lucky enough to have a companion that you adore doesn't mean you're going to marry him... we're not u-haul lesbians how ever we do live together.
I'm not completely out to my family yet. Jimmy is just starting a career that he might be able to build on. There's so many factors that indicate that where I am now in my career, in my relationship, in my life is where I'm supposed to be. No rush to be anywhere else.
And the moments I spend with Jimmy are mine... regardless of what the future looks like.