Monday, October 5, 2009

encourage

I messaged my brother who is a senior in high school for an update.


All of a sudden he's interested in going to college straight after high school and it's going to be a challenge for him considering how poorly he's doing in high school.

I remember how confused I was when I was applying for colleges. I didn't know the difference between tuition and intuition and I didn't really understand what college was for.. it was just the next thing to do.

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In previous entries, I wrote about how I failed at being an older brother and that I could have had more influence in directing him. But now I feel like there are some things that were out of my control.

So maybe I didn't pressure him, guide him or focus him appropriately... and maybe the pressuring that I did do negated his motivation to try harder... until now when I'm completely out of his hair.

I know that growing up, I would have been frustrated with anyone who forced and directed me to do anything that was "good for my future." I am lucky I was offered encouragement to pursue anything... my dad was an artist a musician- he would have been thrilled if I did that too.

If my brother gets into college with his 2.5GPA, his 50% on the SATs and his limited extracurricular , than I am more than happy for him. If not, I am still thankful he has a goal.. whether it was going to college or not... it was something he was striving to do even though it's a bit late(r than your average privileged Asian American high schooler.)

The best thing I could do is encourage... and just be there.
(God, I hope he gets into college)

3 comments:

Gauss Jordan said...

So my own brother made a point of being the anti-me through high school... went away to college for a year, and then realized he'd completely screwed up a good thing. Came back, and all of a sudden I found that he'd actually listen to my random comments and suggestions... Maybe yours just finally came around (earlier!).

Tommy Nguyen said...

He always can do CC and transfer to a UC school. Best wishes

S said...

SJSU FTW! If not, the transfer thing is a good idea but requires a lot of pushing and of course the usual scorning from the overachieving Asians. gl.