Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Another Episode of ToPho's Creek

Light Hearted Anecdotal Entry
This Week On ToPho's Creek... Christopher finds himself really emo. Did he survive New Years on a Two Hour Train Ride? Will Monyrith successfully dress him? Did Christopher finally find a full proven method of converting Straight boys into Gays? Find out this week.. on ToPho's Creek.

There is this straight boy that I went clubbing with. We were all having a great time and we were all liquored up! He was sandwiching a girl with my gay friend and all of a sudden he goes to make out with my gay friend! OMG! Well, I thought to myself, I don't want to miss out on this one so I went up to him and we made out too! WOW! You must be thinking.. omg Christopher, what are you doing? I swear I had nothing to do with this. Haha, seize the day! Yay making out with straight people! So curious.. so DANGEROUS. LOL

A Closet Full of Shame
Monyrith went through my clothes and we got rid of.. I'd say 20 articles.
"Let's get rid of some of your clothes because... you have a lot, but wear the same thing over and over!"
"Umm.. yeah, I guess you can wear this... but it's something I would wear if I was sick, yeah Sick Clothes."
"... I see, this is your favorite? Where's the trash?!"
"You know those shirts that girls wear that is tight around the boobs and then poofs out? yeah, it looks like that."

I guess, it's time to go shopping!

Cal Train Ride of the Twilight Zone
On the Cal Train back to San Jose, I was startled by people arguing. I hid low in my seat so that if there was a fight I would be safe. The train was packed, but we managed to find good seats next to the bathroom. All of a sudden two guys are yelling at each other and the entire train decides to participate.

"Get out of my face! Get out of my face! WTF are you DOING?!!"
"Where there is Action, there is a Reaction! I will react! ACTION REACTION ACTION REACTION ACTION REACTION!!!!!!!!"
Their friend's tried to calm them down.
"He wasn't talking to you, please calm down! Please calm down! Please!"
"Everyone had a happy new year so please relax!!"

They were obviously drunk and very scary. The train responded,
"I think ya'll need a children's story!"
"I could hook you guys up with a whore house in TJs!"
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! !!!!"

Someone shouted, "Happy New Year!" And everyone cheered in order to loosen the tension.
I was seriously scared and tried to close my eyes. No, fights please, horrible way to start the new year. There was more... but I think I suppressed it. When we finally were close to our destination 2 hours later, right before my eyes, this guy was trying to hollar at a girl. He was cruising the train... saw her by herself and plopped down.

"So what's a lady like yourself doing on this train all alone?" He was drunk and white.
"Oh. um, I met up with some friends and now I'm just going home." She was calm, but sort of nervous.
"So... what do you do?"
"Oh, I just graduated... I want to get into architecture"

"How old are you?"
"23... and you? what do you do?"
"I'm 26, I work in construction."
"Cool, my dad does that, heh... hard labor."
"Yeah, you know... so where's your boyfriend?"
"Oh.... I don't have one..."
Okay... the right answer is: "Yes, he's big and he's black and he'll kick your ass."
"I see.. where do you live?" Please please please don't tell him! PLEASE!!!
"Oh... um.. I don't tell people where I live." Okay.. at least shes not.. dumb as a brick.
"I see I see... that's my cousin over there...he's like my body guard" He points to a guy watching him.
"Oh... cool."
"Yeah, I'm a family man.... Do you like food?"
"Yeah, i love food."
"That's great, I should take you out to dinner sometime."

"Oh that's okay, I don't usually go out."
"I can cook for you." WOW

... at this point, I realized I was staring with my mouth open and turned away and concentrated on surviving the night. Geezus.

I wish I was ELMO instead of Emo.

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